24 kicks ass and the chargers don't

24
For those of you who don’t watch 24, kindly skip over this blog and go on to the next one. It’s not that I don’t care about those of you who don’t find good tv, but you’ll be bored, and I’ll sound crazy rambling on about one man single handedly fighting an entire network of terrorist masterminds. Ok, and for right now, I don’t care about people who don’t find good tv. So go! Now!





Ok, I think they’re gone. Have CTU monitor they’re status to make sure they’ve gone onto the next blog. SO I just got done watching 1-3pm, the 2 hour episode. And I have one small problem right now with Jack. Let’s see, in 2 hours, Jack managed to track Morris through LA, find the terrorist hideout, disarm a nuclear bomb, and do his laundry. Laundry alone takes me 2 hours, let alone getting across LA at 2 in the afternoon.

But even with all of his superhuman feats, he misses the most obvious thing in the entire freakin episode! That his own father is obviously one of the supervillans! How did he miss him staring menacingly at him through the glass right before he left CTU?! Any moron knows that only supervillans stare at people menacingly from across the room. That’s like rule 3 or 4 of action hero training. And still off he goes on a wild goose chase to the west side of LA at 2:45. If you don’t know LA, that alone should take the next three episodes. Next week’s cliff hanger should be him hitting another traffic light at La Cienaga. Besides, remind me exactly why civilians are being allowed to wander around the headquarters of the elite counter terrorism unit of our government? Jack to Buchanon: “Where is my dad, whose company accidentally leaked nukes to terrorists?” Buchanon: “Oh, I think he’s examining your brother’s cell phone and wallet without supervision. It’s easier to cover evidence up that way.” Jack: “Shouldn’t we just let him into the basement to hack all of our computers? Buchanon: “God dammit Jack, we did that last season!”

Look, my advice to Jack is to assume that if a character comes around that is in any way related to you or is linked romantically, save us all a few minutes of the show by killing them immediately. We all know they’re gonna die, chances are he’s gonna kill them anyway, just get it over with. “Jack, your Grandma is here to see you.” “Quick! Give her 30 cc’s of… of fuck it.” BAM. That way we could have a decent body count by episode 1 of next season and it would save us all from the “granny running an underground organization hellbent on global domination” plot. Oh well.

Believe me, my venting does not mean that I don’t love the show. It’s great. But what’s a good action show/movie without a little armchair quarterbacking.

Speaking of which…. Why did San Diego fire Marty Schottenheimer now? I’m a Charge fan and am fine with the firing of a good regular season but lousy playoff coach who doesn’t get along with a genious GM. But why now? You lost Cam Cameron, who mark my words, will be next season’s Sean Payton/Eric Mangeni.

Chargers, you did it again. You are a few weeks away from the scouting combines without any of your top 3 coaching spots filled and all good coaches pretty much already having jobs. I don’t believe in curses on organizations. But I do believe that there are organizations worth cursing at.